Posts Tagged ‘Goals’

10.Dec.2012 |

How Far is Too Far in Dating?

Turn on the car engine and there’s a destination in mind. You want to go and you don’t want to stop. That’s sex.

The focus on the physical, although it feels so good, limits a relationship in other ways.

Without a wedding ring on the finger, the mystery in a relationship disappears. Growth is stunted. Disappointment rises.

In dating, many are looking for the keeper or the lasting relationship.

Therefore discover the other’s likes, dislikes and dreams. Watch their habits and treatment of people. These are the things that matter longterm.

Great sex can be learned but not all people discipline themselves in the give and take of relationships.

How far is too far? Would I do what I am doing with my date in front of others? Am I defending or hiding my behavior from others?

Overall sex is not a fulfillment of the missing element but rather it’s the expression of love found. It’s the celebration of the marriage commitment.
(Song of Solomon 8:12)

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20.Nov.2012 |

Is He/She the One?

Do you like to worship the same way? (2 Corinthians 6:14)
Do you share moral and ethical standards? (Mark 7:20-23, 1 Corinthians 15:33)
Do you enjoy his/her company? (Luke 6:31, Ephesians 4:29-32)
Could his/her ambitions and wants work with yours?(Proverbs 29:18, Ephesians 5:21)
Can you respect his/her family? They are a part of the marriage deal. (Ephesians 6:2)
If habits/beliefs never changed, would you still make a life commitment in marriage to him/her? (Malachi 2:16)

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30.Jan.2012 |

Buses and Blessing

I have distinct memories of the Sweetman “bus period”. We had no where to live and so good friends lent us a bus. We parked it in my parents backyard, ran a power chord to my parents’ house and while Dean and I had a bed, the kids slept on bus seats. It was a difficult time.

In times like these, it’s hard not to look around and think why me. We know that there are worse scenarios but we tend to still compare ourselves to those doing better.

We’re not in the bus anymore. We are far from it. It’s just a humorous memory but it also was a launching pad for a better life.

Before the bus, we had goals. We wanted to be blessed. These goals were still with us in the trying time of living in a bus. The goals were achieved as we dealt with the stuff in our lives that had led to this living standard.

In 1 Chronicles 4:8-10, Jabez asks God for blessing. One component that accompanied his request was pain. In fact Jabez’s name meant ‘pain’. He knew pain well.

It’s not that we should seek out painful situations but we should understand that the path to blessing can involve pain.

Pain doesn’t necessarily mean that we are on the wrong path or out of the will of God. We may just be well on the way to our blessing.

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03.Jan.2012 |

Goals and Forgiveness

By now many of us have set goals for 2012. Some of these are easily attained while others seem to allude us. Failure in achievement is sometimes due to the fact that we find ourselves comparing ourselves to others and so we become resentful. We find ourselves in an ugly spiral that takes us further from our goals.

As believers many of us have looked at Rahab the prostitute in the book of Joshua and breathed a sigh of relief. At least we have not been that awful that we have sold ourselves as prostitutes. Rahab though surprises all. She is in the lineage of Christ in Matthew 1:5, was a woman of faith in Hebrews 11:31 and was right with God in James 2:25.

Success starts with the heart. The writing of goals means that we must look at our heart if we are to go anywhere.

God continually looks beyond our actions to the very core of our being. Our willingness to be honest with ourselves greatly helps us achieve in life.

Our personal acceptance and perception of self empowers us for life. Our discipline of self to limit our judgments of others, also enables us to succeed and find contentment.

Rahab did not allow her past nor others’ perceptions of herself to dictate her future.

Rahab was a successful prostitute but she made a decision to give it all up. Not because of others’ thoughts but because she knew better. She in Jericho was the only who saw the wrong in her heart and decided to change. She left culture, friends, falsehoods and a successful livelihood.

Many give up when a goal gets hard. Yet Rahab hides two full grown Hebrew enemies and then lowers them over the city wall as a single female. Either she was one hefty prostitute who worked out every day or an extremely determined woman who was desperate to find God.

She watched the fall of Jericho including the horrific death of friends and comrades as the walls collapsed. She still though did not default to excuse and resentment but continued to choose God, a virtual stranger to her.

She embraced the culture of Israel and God with no reserve or excuse. It would have been so easy to look at this strange new belief system and throw up her hands in horror. This strange new hebrew belief system stoned prostitutes and yet she kept on going. She recognized that it was for her to move toward God and accept His ways rather than vice versa.

The accomplishment of goals starts with self. Our surrender of not fair, they are wrong, they haven’t, I know better, has to be recognized as a bad habit. God is not a rewarder of our right opinion but a rewarder of faith. Faith requires that we give up the right of having our way.

Forgiveness requires the work of dwelling no more on past mistakes and even those of others. The measure of our lives has little to do with another but is all about pursuing that which God puts in our way, even when it means a few disappointments and surrenders along the way.

Rahab took responsibility upon herself for her life. She gave up her comfort and independence to find God.

God saw in Rahab, a woman that did not waste words but applied faith to deal with her own heart. Her measuring stick for success had little to do with comparison to others but applying God’s Words to her own life.

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15.Nov.2011 |

Mums Leading Strong

Life is full for today’s mum.

For myself, I had my own music business, cleaning business and then taught at a school. When we started our church I went back to teaching piano. Because I loved church, I was involved in so many areas.

Because Dean believed in me, he regularly announced that I could do anything!

I made mistakes as a mum. There were many angry days and my kids knew it. And so part of my leadership as a mum meant apologizing.

Failure though does not mean that we stop leading our children. We must make adjustments but still lead strong. We don’t let guilt dictate our parenting.

As a woman, I did stress easily. Dean travelled, I often had to work, we moved overseas, we raised children without extended family and we have faced chronic illness. Finances were basically absent in the early years of our marriage. My mind whirled with worry.

However I kept in mind the importance of my children. They are our legacy when life is done.

My vision for my children – loving God and therefore loving family, church and people. They were encouraged to embrace learning and change, to better themselves and therefore offer help to others.

The boys loved their upbringing but know that it was not perfect. None is and we laugh at our shortcomings. But deep and real chats with mum, and fun and entrepreneurial ventures with dad have created great memories. Despite busyness, they felt loved and important.

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