Roles in Marriage
God did not create roles for each of the sexes. Rather in Genesis, Adam and Eve worked side by side in the Garden of Eden while God told both to take dominion and multiply.
Over time man has assigned roles that have become strong influences in church circles. For example, I grew up thinking that great moms do not work. However Eve continued to work beyond having children while the woman in Proverbs 31 had her own businesses.
Does this make it wrong to be a stay at home mom? Definitely not but often our finances require that we as women return to the workforce. If this occurs, then both parents will need to step up to provide a stable home life. Sacrifices will need to be made by both partners to enable a family to function. While the mother also earns income, then a father will need to help in areas that are new to him.
Marriage And Sacrifice
Husbands and wives create their marriages. Great marriages do not just happen. A man and wife are continually in the process of becoming one. Becoming one is not an automatic occurrence at the swapping of the wedding vows.
Some times a husband will need to sacrifice deeply for a wife while at other times it is vice versa. Often in marriage, one will look at the other and see that it is a moment when one needs to step up and help the other. We should not ever be negligent at stepping up and providing the support and care that the other needs. Maybe it’s some task that you do not usually perform but right at a particular time, the other needs help.
This has happened often to us. There were days early in our marriage when I felt like a single mom as Dean was away for long periods of time. I felt frustration at being left at home with two toddlers for long periods of time. Seasons though are just that and they do pass and new opportunities arise.
Sacrifice in marriage must be made but it should not always be one sided. Twenty years on in our marriage found me returning to school. This meant that our home was run less efficiently while more departments at work had to be designated to other people. This affected Dean and our boys.
Modes Of Sacrifice For Families
Much has been sacrificed in our marriage. With two parents traveling, both of us have had to do things that one would not want to do. This has meant that both of us feels a deep sense of satisfaction at what we have achieved.
Things that we have maintained in this sacrifice is not spending large sums of money without the other knowing. We worked hard at making sure that our boys were loved and cared for in our absences and both of us have passed up great opportunities in favor of our children. One may come back from days away of hard work but a return home is not to rest but to step straight into the mode of parenting for the sake of the children.
Phone bills have been large to maintain communication while apart and even on a physical and emotional level this is often draining due to time differences around the world. Calls are often late at night or very early in the morning.
Sacrifice meant at times that Dean and I have renegotiated our priorities as we believe that nothing is worth damage to our marriage or children. Sacrifice has caused us to talk deeply regarding our future and plans and we have discovered both strengths and weaknesses in each other that were unknown earlier in married years. This does not disappoint either one of us but is more something to cherish about the other.
The Real meaning Of Sacrifice
The word ’sacrifice’ is often cheapened in today’s society. We conjure up images of tribal dances and rituals. These images carry a sense of darkness and mystery. However sacrifice in marriage carries life as it shows the the other that we care and value them.
When we give up some thing that is precious to ourselves such as our time, resources and energy we bring life to our marriages. We enable the other to achieve and carry on. We also as we sacrifice for another, sow into the other, therefore creating an atmosphere where the other will want to give back.